Hello folks, and welcome to the 2nd annual This Is Country Music 20 Worst Singles of 2014 list. This year, in addition to myself and sabre14, we have Pulse Music Board member zack97 contributing to our list. Without further ado, here are the twenty worst radio singles of 2014, as voted on by TICM contributors. Stay tuned for our Best Of list, coming soon!

#20
Little Big Town, "Day Drinking"

After "Your Side Of The Bed" and "Sober" under performed at radio, it was obvious that Little Big needed something upbeat and fun in the vein of "Pontoon" to catapult themselves back into top five territory. With that we have "Day Drinking". This song is lazy and annoying, the whistles throughout make it hard to enjoy, and do we really need more songs about how fun drinking is? It's an overdone topic as is, throw in a grating production and you have a mess of a single. - zack97

#19
Darius Rucker, "Homegrown Honey"

While "Homegrown Honey" was already a dull, unoriginal song to begin with, what makes it even worse is the fact that it's such a blatant attempt to return to radio after "Miss You" bombed. Bro-country is dead dude, get with the times. "Ooo, I dig the way that you move" is an embarrassing line. *sigh* - Markus Meyer 

#18
The Band Perry, "Chainsaw"

While "Chainsaw" is fairly unoffensive upon first listen, it grows worse upon each listen. When The Band Perry is on their game, they're interesting, and they hold up after repeated listens. "Chainsaw" is neither, it's boring, and it's grating. - MM

#17
Eric Paslay, "Song About A Girl"

This song spends three and a half minutes telling you what this song is not about but at the same time never going in depth about what the song "is" about. I'm sorry but Eric's song about "nothing", or at least nothing we haven't heard a million times before about a heartbreak queen rockin' the jeans before, if you ask me, and one I wish was never a single. - sabre14

#16
Miranda Lambert and Carrie Underwood, "Somethin' Bad"

I expect better from both of these two. Lambert and Underwood have produced some of the most compelling material of the past five years, and this is what we get from their duet? Disappointing. This is all style, no substance, it's loud for the sake of being loud, and worst of all, it's pointless. Somethin' bad indeed. - MM

#14
Brantley Gilbert / Justin Moore / Thomas Rhett, "Small Town Throwdown"

This obnoxious piece of trash is easily the worst song on what was an otherwise brilliant album in Just As I Am. It's cliched, it's loud, and Thoma Rhett sounds terrible with his exaggerated twang. No thanks. - MM

#13
Maggie Rose, "Girl In Your Truck Song"

Maggie, why? When you put out three dynamite songs out to radio that barely make a dent with them its frustrating. So she thought that combining the names of a lot of famous "bro country" hits("Thats My Kind Of Night", "Chillin' It", etc.) would be a great idea. Unfortunately for her, this song doesn't work at all, largely due to the fact that the lyrics are lazy and stupid. Seriously Maggie. get on Maddie & Tae's side. At least they mentioned the bro songs cleverly and stood up for the females. - zack97

#12
Florida Georgia Line feat. Luke Bryan, "This Is How We Roll"

With this song came the same song and dance (literally) with FGL. A catchy melody but God awful lyrics. The overproduction is nothing new with them but the rapping by Tyler during the one of the song's verses was (on radio at least) and easily the worst part of the song. - sabre14

#11
Rascal Flatts, "Payback"

Sure, Rascal Flatts have had some bad singles over the years, but this one takes the cake. Gary LeVox sounds laughably bad here, as does everything else about this obnoxious, immature, and just plain bad "song". Apparantely country radio agreed, as it missed the top 20. You're better than this guys. - MM

#10
Jason Aldean, "Burnin' It Down"

The only country sounding thing to me in "Burnin' It Down" is Jason's vocals. This is more Pop than Kelleigh's song which is saying something. The production has more of a Hip-Hop and R&B feel than a country one. The lyrics are another look away moment. There's nothing "offensive" or "taboo" about saying "Naked in my bed". But the reason most don't use it, is because it sounds, well, stupid. Probably my least favorite Aldean song but most obviously disagree as it topped the Mediabase and Billboard charts for multiple weeks... - sabre14

#9
Kelleigh Bannen, "Famous"

I know country radio is trending more into the Pop sound as time goes on but "Famous" takes it to a new level. The chorus made me though I had tuned into a Hot AC station when it first came on the radio. Quite the change from Kelleigh's country sounds on her first single, "Sorry On The Rocks". Kelleigh has immense talent but "Famous" masks it. - sabre14

#8
Chris Lane, "Broken Windshield View"

A song about small town pride with an obnoxiously loud chorus? Yeah, that pretty much sums up this song. It's obvious he's trying to cash in on the bro crowd like Cole Swindell and Chase Rice did, but unfortunately, he's a little too late. Try again with a better song next time Chris. - zack97

#5
Joey Hyde, "Get It On"

This is a perfect example of what not to release as your debut single. "Get It On" is uncreative in every way, shape and form. The lyrics are unoriginal. The instrumentation is repetitive, and the production is overbearing. Not a good first step into country radio. - sabre14

#4
Florida Georgia Line, "Sun Daze"

The boys of Florida Georgia Line took it a little too far with this song. Getting stoned is nothing new in country music, but the problem with this song is that the entire song talks about NOTHING other than getting stoned, oh and getting laid (classy). I don't think anyone will be able to forget the infamous "pink umbrella" line. Ugh. - zack97

#3
Dylan Scott, "Mmm, Mmm, Mmm"

We've heard this type of song 100000 times. A guy thinks a girls so hot that he wants to express that by showing how it makes him feel and how country he is. This song is one of the worst examples of this, nothing but cliche country boy lyrics that sound so stupid. The title doesn't even have an actual word in it. - zack97

#2
Tim McGraw, "Lookin' For That Girl"

When I first heard this song, something happened that had never happened to me before - my jaw dropped in disbelief. I couldn't imagine that this was indeed Tim McGraw. It sounded like some awful computerized auto-tune machine sputtering out odd and strange lyrics. I never thought Tim would outdo "Truck Yeah" in the horrendous department but he did so with flying colors. - sabre14

#1
Jerrod Niemann, "Donkey"

I have nothing to say that hasn't already been said a million time about this atrocity. This is embarrassing to Jerrod Niemann, his label, the songwriters, the producer, and country music. Everything about this is just terrible. An absolute no-brainer for my most hated single of 2014. Jaw droppingly bad. - MM

Oh Jerrod. You had so much potential. You have an excellent voice and has shown that you're not afraid to take risks in your music, as exemplified by your 2012 release Free the Music. But that project bombed so I guess you had to give in and release a generic bro song like "Drink to that all Night". I get it, you have to make a living. But this? This is unacceptable.

To put it lightly, "Donkey" makes today's radio fodder seem revolutionary. I really thought we had reached rock bottom when Brantley Gilbert released "Kick It In The Sticks" back in 2012. It seems as though Blackjack Billy had something to say about that when they released "The Booze Cruise" last summer. And when Tim McGraw released "Lookin' For That Girl" I honest to god thought they couldn't do worse if they tried. Well... they did worse. I'm passed the point of being angry or disappointed about it. At this point it's hilarious. It's as if label execs are playing a huge game of "who can release the biggest pile of crap to radio". 

"Donkey" features processed vocals, obnoxious melody and production, coupled with lyrics that basically go like "I'm gonna ride a donkey to the club and have sex LAWL". There is literally NOTHING listenable about this song. I can appreciate a good novelty song, but this... this is embarrassing to not just country, but music in general.

I say this with caution, but I truly believe that we cannot get any worse than "Donkey". It is deeper than bottom of the barrel. It goes through the barrel and smashes the concrete beneath.

RIP good Jerrod Niemann.
2010-2013

Grade: F
Listen: "Donkey"

Oh Tim.

You have the talent, and a discography to back up the fact that you can indeed make great music. And when I say great I mean GREAT.

But the fact that 3 of 5 singles you've released from Big Machine have been duds disturbs me to no end.

But the fact that your latest is the worst is even more disturbing. This ranks below "Truck Yeah" in terms of quality. At least that had.... OK, there weren't actually any redeeming qualities to that monstrosity, but it's better than this.

The fact that this is a straight up pop song (and a bad one at that) is the least of it's problems.

The lyrics are among the most offensive we've seen from any song over the past year or so. I'd go give you examples but I think I'd get nightmares. 

Then there's the auto-tune. Why do people use that crap? If you can't sing, why exactly are you in this industry? 

I kinda wish it was overproduced to death Dan Huff style so I didn't have to hear it.


Grade: F

Listen: "Lookin' For That Girl"

Wow. What a year in country music. You have some artists releasing career best material, yet other have to cancel that out with some of the biggest piles of crap I've heard in the past few years (yes, I do in fact dislike some songs).
Myself, sabre14 and Pulse Music Board user .indulgecountry compiled lists of our 15 least favorite singles of 2013 and using a points system I made the following list. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present you TICM's top 15 worst singles of 2013.

#15 
Jason Mitchell, "Stomp"

"Stomp, stomp, shake your rhomp", I rest my case. -S14

#14
Chris Young, "Aw Naw"

Frat-boy anthem tailor made for radio. Young is capable of so much more than this. 
- MM

#13
Florida-Georgia Line, "Stay"

I actually think Stay is FGL's worst single to date. It's lyrics are cringeworthy, and unrealistic. And the vocal performance is below average as well. - S14

#12
Eric Church, "The Outsiders"

An over-calculated statement song that fails to really say anything.
Poorly-phrased and hackneyed lyrics are treated to a shouty vocal performance
and drowned in heavy metal production that leaves out any indication of country music from the equation. -IC

#11
Kelly Clarkson, "Tie It Up"

Screechy, overproduced pop music. I have no doubt Clarkson is capable of great country music, but if this is a sign of things to come, my expectations are not high 
-MM

#10
Toby Keith, "Shut Up And Hold On"


Toby really can't do much worse than this tune. What is up with that backup singer at the end Toby? -S14

#9
Blackjack Billy, "Get Some"

I could go on a rant. But I've spent enough of my time and effort writing about these guys already. -MM

#8
Blake Shelton, "Boys 'Round Here"

 Lyrically the song plays out like a checklist of all the country cliches
that can be covered in one song, with a delivery akin to having those lyrics
first thrown into a blender. It also relies heavily on gimmicky, repetitive
lines to create hooks and features a poor vocal delivery from a singer capable
of much better. -IC

#7 
Tim McGraw, "Southern Girl"

 Let's see here. Boring, cliche,.. uh... Boring. This song was the definition of mediocrity. "Southern Girl" rivals "Truck Yeah" for the worst single of Tim's career. -S14

#6
Jason Aldean, "1994"

Lazy, nonsensical lyrics that rely too much on cramming as many ill-fitting
references to Joe Diffie tunes into one song are only made worse by an equally
uninspired vocal performance. Things are made worse by a ridiculous chant of
Diffie's name and generic rock production. -IC

#5
Jerrod Niemann, "Drink To That All Night"

Can we please stop it with the auto tune. There is no need for it in this genre. The auto tune coupled with the dance bar type beat makes this a pop song on country radio. Jerrod's voice is subpar on this song to say the least. -S14

#4
Blackjack Billy, "The Booze Cruise"

My cat threw up. It could have made a better song than this. I'm not exaggerating. These guys have no talent, this isn't catchy, original or intelligent in any way. -MM

#3
Dallas Smith, "Tippin Point"

Please don't make judgements of Canadian country based on this song. There is so much better stuff. Bro-y lyrics, average production and the vocals are processed to death. -MM

#2
Luke Bryan, "That's My Kind Of Night"

This song is one big fat mess in every aspect. Any and all elements of
country music are absent from its production and cringe-worthy vocal effects
plague the chorus, the melody is unpleasant, and the lyrics are just
embarrassingly bad. Nothing about this is a "winner". -IC

#1
Chase Rice, "Ready Set Roll"

I can only put a few lines down here, so I'll hold back the best I can. My least favorite single in years. It's uncreative. Horribly cliche. Awful lyrics. And in my opinion degrading to women. This is the best example of trying to capitalize on Bro-Country. -S14

This new Tim McGraw single does have some things going for it.

The first one is a stripped down production, the second is a relaxed, natural performance.

Unfortunately, that's all there is. 

The lyrics are about, surprise, a southern girl. Like seriously, why do all girls in country songs have to be from the south. Why not from Japan or Mexico or something. At least that would be entertaining.

It features every cliché you can name, from her mama teaching her how to act to cutoff jeans. Then you have the talk back voice from chorus to verse saying "southern girl rock my world" (worst "rhyme" in music in my opinion).

It's not a station changer but it's not exactly great either.

Southern girls are good. What I just said in 4 words Tim McGraw felt the need to say in 3 minutes.


Grade: C

Listen: "Southern Girl"

Billy Currington - "Hey Girl"
Not offensive. Has a nice little grove to it. Sounds like another Billy Currington track. He seems to have about one true gem an album and this is not it. I really like his voice but this is basically another addition to his oft forgotten hit catalog. Here's to hoping for another "People Are Crazy," "Good Directions" or "Love Done Gone" soon!

Grade: C

The Henningsens - American Beautiful
They have written some good stuff for The Band Perry and so I do not doubt their talent, but this song is an outright dud that plays like Lady Antebellum's "American Honey" with an even less appealing hook.

Grade: D

Greg Bates - "Fill In the Blank"
He hasn't hit a truly great song yet but Greg seems to be the best new male vocalist around due to his neo-traditional bent that is coupled with lyrics that are just clever enough to avoid being cliche/rote, which is impressive given the appalling titles. This one in particular manages to be effortlessly sexy and suggestive without being grotesque like many songs in the same vein.

Grade: B+

Darius Rucker - Wagon Wheel
The original is great. This is better than a lot of what is out, but it loses the magic of the performance and thus loses some of its charm. Props for the attempt and the nice choice of material though.

Grade: B

Tim McGraw (Feat. Taylor Swift and Keith Urban) - "Highway Don’t Care"
First single from the album that is somewhat memorable to me. Still no where near the glory days of Tim's Everywhere-era. The most intriguing thing for this track since it is rather bland is whether it will maintain Country cred for Taylor in this time where she is focusing almost entirely on pop music.

Grade: C+

Let me start off by saying that this single was orignally recorded for Colt's 2011 album 'Every Chance I Get'.

It is released because of it's involvement with Tim McGraw's 'Tim McGraw and Friends' album.

Now, to the review.

One of the hardest things for me to do as a country fan is explain why I don't hate Colt Ford. So I won't bother. I'll just simply say that I don't hate Colt Ford.

This is his most enjoyable single to date. The lyrics tell a story of a teenager's life, and the up's and down's of it.

Such as: 'It ain't rained in a month, Mama just took a job, part time at the five and dime, four times as hard' and 'quarterback, first string, gave my highschool ring to the prettiest little girl, green eyes and red hair, think I might ask her to marry me one night at the fair'.

The song finishes off with the narrarator moving back to his hometown, and back to the country. I'm willing to forget that part ever hapenned because of the strength of the rest of the song.

Ford does an excellent job rapping the verse, but McGraw deserves a bulk of the credit, as he does an excellent job on the chorus.

Will this become a hit? Not likely. But the road of "Twisted" and "Back" is one I would recommend Ford go further down.


Grade: A-

Entertainer

Should win:

Jason Aldean- MM
Blake Shelton
Miranda Lambert- GP
Luke Bryan
Taylor Swift


Will win:

Jason Aldean
Blake Shelton- GP
Miranda Lambert
Luke Bryan
Taylor Swift- MM

Markus: Meh, went with Aldean because he released "Fly Over States". Swift will win due to fan-voting. 

Gator: Just because, despite her bad year, Miranda is still my favorite. Blake will because he just won't stop it seems.

Male Vocalist

Should win:

Luke Bryan
Jason Aldean
Eric Church- MM, GP
Toby Keith
Blake Shelton


Will win:

Luke Bryan
Jason Aldean
Eric Church- GP
Toby Keith
Blake Shelton- MM

Markus: Church has released the best music, but I wouldn't bet against Shelton. I like the Toby Keith nom.

Gator: I agree Church has the best music but I think he will win because the ACM's can be pretty adventurous


Female Vocalist

Should win:

Taylor Swift
Miranda Lambert
Martina McBride
Carrie Underwood- MM, GP
Kacey Musgraves


Will win:

Taylor Swift
Miranda Lambert- MM
Martina McBride
Carrie Underwood- GP
Kacey Musgraves


Markus: Why is McBride even nominated? Anyways, I'm not an Underwood fan, but she has released some of the best music of her career, along with a great album. Too bad I can't see Lambert losing.

Gator: Carrie by far has the best vocals in the category and with her great commercial and critical year I think its hers to lose.


Duo

Should win:

Florida Georgia Line
Big & Rich
Thompson Square- MM
Sugarland
Love and Theft


Will win:

Florida Georgia Line- MM, GP
Big & Rich
Thompson Square
Sugarland
Love and Theft


Markus: TS has released "Glass" and "If I Didn't Have You". Two excellent singles. But FGL has dat "Cruise" momentum.

Gator: I don't think any should win and that they should combine this category with group but i suppose it will go to Florida-Georgia Line


Group

Should win:

Eli Young Band
Lady Antebellum
The Band Perry
Little Big Town- GP
Zac Brown Band- MM


Will win:

Eli Young Band
Lady Antebellum
The Band Perry
Little Big Town- MM, GP
Zac Brown Band


Markus: It's the LBT era now. So they'll win. But I'm rooting for ZBB all the way!

Gator: This time next year I'll be voting for The Band Perry most likely, but since it's not, I'll go with Little BIg Town because they've been good quality and great commercially.

Single

Should win:

Little Big Town- 'Pontoon'
Miranda Lambert- 'Over You'
Eli Young Band- 'Even If It Breaks Your Heart'
Eric Church- 'Springsteen'- MM, GP
Hunter Hayes- 'Wanted'


Will win:

Little Big Town- 'Pontoon'- MM, GP
Miranda Lambert- 'Over You'
Eli Young Band- 'Even If It Breaks Your Heart'
Eric Church- 'Springsteen'
Hunter Hayes- 'Wanted'


Markus: 'Springsteen' is by far my favorite. But I can't seem them passing on 'Pontoon' after the CMA's and Grammy's didn't. It's not like the ACM's have ever been creative.  

Gator: I like Church's the best but I don't think "Pontoon" is as bad as people try to make it out. I can handle it winning,


Song

Should win:

Miranda Lambert- 'Over You'
Eli Young Band- 'Even If It Breaks Your Heart'
Eric Church- 'Springsteen'- MM, GP
Lee Brice- 'A Woman Like You'
Hunter Hayes- 'Wanted'


Will win:

Miranda Lambert- 'Over You'- MM, GP
Eli Young Band- 'Even If It Breaks Your Heart'
Eric Church- 'Springsteen'
Lee Brice- 'A Woman Like You'
Hunter Hayes- 'Wanted'


Markus: 'Springsteen' is legendary, but will lose to 'Over You'. *sigh*.

Gator: One final nomination for "Over You" and one final victory. I've got to say it has grown on me with all this belated attention.


Vocal event

Should win:

Kelly Clarkson & Vince Gill- 'Don't Rush'- GP
Kenny Chesney & Tim McGraw- 'Feel Like A Rockstar'
Rascal Flatts & Natasha Bedingfield- 'Easy'- MM
Jason Aldean, Eric Church & Luke Bryan- 'The Only Way I Know'
David Nail & Sarah Buxton- 'Let It Rain'


Will win:

Kelly Clarkson & Vince Gill- 'Don't Rush'
Kenny Chesney & Tim McGraw- 'Feel Like A Rockstar'
Rascal Flatts & Natasha Bedingfield- 'Easy'
Jason Aldean, Eric Church & Luke Bryan- 'The Only Way I Know'- MM, GP
David Nail & Sarah Buxton- 'Let It Rain'


Markus: None of them blow me away, but 'Easy' is my fave. Though, I guarantee 'The Only Way I Know' will win.

Gator: I think Vince and Kelly are the best (and if this was the Grammy's it would have a chance) but the star power is too much to bypass here.


Album
 
Should win:

Taylor Swift- 'Red'
Eric Church- 'Chief'- MM
Carrie Underwood- 'Blown Away'- GP
Luke Bryan- 'Tailgates and Tanlines'
Little Big Town- 'Tornado'


Will win:

Taylor Swift- 'Red'
Eric Church- 'Chief'- MM, GP
Carrie Underwood- 'Blown Away'
Luke Bryan- 'Tailgates and Tanlines'
Little Big Town- 'Tornado'
 

Markus: 'Chief' is my fave and I also have a feeling it will win.

Gator: Underwood did some great stuff and was the biggest step forward, but I don't see her picking it up over Church.



New Artist

Should win:
 
Florida Georgia Line
Brantley Gilbert- MM
Jana Kramer - GP

Will win: 

Florida Georgia Line
Brantley Gilbert- MM, GP
Jana Kramer

Markus: Don't love any of them, but I love "More Than Miles", so I guess I'll go with Gilbert. Oh, he will win as well.

Gator: Jana is by far the most acceptable nominee and the most interesting one. While I'd love to see her deservingly win this, I see her fiancee stepping in for the victory.


Video

Should win:
 
Eric Church- 'Creepin'
Kacey Musgraves- 'Merry Go 'Round'- GP
Hunter Hayes- 'Wanted'
Little Big Town- 'Tornado'
Taylor Swift- 'We Are Never Ever Ever Getting Back Together'
Zac Brown Band- 'The Wind' - MM

Will win:

Eric Church- 'Creepin'- MM
Kacey Musgraves- 'Merry Go 'Round'- GP
Hunter Hayes- 'Wanted'
Little Big Town- 'Tornado'
Taylor Swift- 'We Are Never Ever Ever Getting Back Together'
Zac Brown Band- 'The Wind'
 
Markus: Lol. How can you not love the video for 'The Wind'? I also like the video for 'Merry Go Round' though. I think this will go to 'Creepin' but I could see 'Wanted' taking it as well.

Gator: I personally think that Musgraves' video was an eloquent depiction of her excellent single and the fact that she is even nominated is awesome. Her somewhat surprising nomination makes me think she could win it, but I would not be surprised if Hayes sneaks in with his boyish charm.